Friday, December 03, 2010

Another sequel of pain.

When I first started blogging, I only wanted to be famous. (True story) I was sixteen back then, please excuse my shallow minded sixteen year old self. I updated about my daily life and I put up facts too, not to forget about the silly crushes I had during my secondary school. Everything that I wrote was all in the name wanting to be famous, to get 3428932190 views per day. Like I said, I was sixteen.

Things changed after awhile.. I stopped updating about how my day went, I stopped posting up facts or anything in between.. I started writing about my feelings since I was (and still am) bad at showing it. This place became my personal space; I wrote almost everything in here. My feelings, my thoughts, the voices inside me, everything and the amount of comments that I got from being honest about myself seemed to be appalling. From there, you can see how thick their skulls can be.. People judged me from my posts. Just because my posts were heavy, they thought I was suicidal. Some loved how honest I was with my feelings and they said it should be something I can be proud of.

I just don't want to sugarcoat my life in here anymore because behind my smiles that you see from my pictures, I still want to know that I am experiencing pain. Just because I post something about my past, it doesn't make me weak. This place has pretty much taught me to not judge people based on what they write. Humans are like vultures. They take you down when you are at your lowest point and point out your mistakes, make yourself feel low and probably become suicidal after that.

For almost a year, I stopped blogging about my feelings.. I just stopped being honest and I wasn't happy about it because I was scared of these vultures judging me again but I guess those days are over because I am back. I am back with feelings and all.

And I am not scared.

3 comments:

  1. u r always honest abt ur feelings. dont let anyone take tht priviledge away from u. keep on writing abt ur feelings

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  2. yg "i am not scared" tu cool ;)

    -PL-

    ReplyDelete