Sunday, December 05, 2010

The nicest thing - Kate Nash

mm

This would be the last time I write anything about you, here.

Yesterday, I went to all the places that we went when we were together.. Each and every places, I spent half an hour on each places. The memories just seeped in to me and my breathing started being heavy. I could feel the tears welling up..

I went to the tuition center first.. The place where I saw you with your cream shorts and light yellow t-shirt that I've always loved. I remember from a distance, I told my friend how hot you were, and since then, you never left my mind. I also remember I was being cocky by telling my friends that one day, you'll be mine. It was the place I used my stupid tricks to talk to you by exchanging The Simpsons DVD because I told you I've never watched it when I actually had the scripts memorized for watching it too many times.

I went to Craven after that.. the place where my friends and I would go when we skip tuition. I'd just randomly call you and ask you to join me and the first time you came.. You wore this green t-shirt that you gave me with your skinny blue jeans. You came with your friend, Aidid and then you sent me back. It was pretty much my Friday routine before we got together, to call you every Friday evening and ask to hang out.

KDE was my next stop... The place where you told me that you got your acceptance letter from a Uni in Penang. I wasn't happy even though you weren't mine at that time because you'd be far away from me. After I found out about that, I told Zaahira that I'm gonna give you my guitar pick necklace, so that you'd still remember me if things change. We would go there every Friday evening, and I remember this one video I recorded after throwing you shoes at the playground and I forced you to say that I'm cute. You wore your gray t-shirt.

Then, I went to Coffee Bean.. The place where you asked me to be yours and confessed your love for me. It was after my IU Day that I forced you to come.. I remember the day perfectly. We were sitting at this one corner and Nadhir was looking at us because it was so weird to see us like that. I was pretty much glued to you at that time. You told me about your feelings and you kissed my forehead. Fifth of April, 2008. Since then, every single Friday.. we'd walk all the way from my tuition center to Coffee Bean. Since we broke up, I never went there because it was hard seeing the seats where it all happened but yesterday, I sat at that very place, alone. Letting of our memories for the last time.

You can call me pathetic for still doing this to myself, you can call me stupid. I did that all in the name of love and I'm not ashamed of it.

Remember the place when you told me you were scared of leaving to Penang because both of us were so afraid of the changes we might be facing? You cried that evening, with me. In front of me. I was shattered when you cried. I'd rather see myself crying than you.

I also went to the park where I did a surprise birthday for you. I came back for you. I knew if I pissed you off enough, you'd go to your friends and I told your friends to bring you to that park that had balloons and cupcakes.

You gave me so much memories, too much.

I don't say forever often but when I say it, I mean it.

I love you, forever. Always have and always will. You are definitely my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.

Take care, babyboy.

6 comments:

  1. nice post . i'd like to comment more but unfortunately , got to off9 asap . nway , i just left a comment in ur post entitled 'goodbye nov'.
    hope u read it dear :)

    -izz

    ReplyDelete
  2. u make me cry.sedih lah post neyh :(

    ReplyDelete
  3. izz: i've replied there. :) thank you so much.

    suzy: you know him too kan..

    ReplyDelete
  4. nad, i wish i know who this guy that stole your heart so badly is. because, he seriously is someone in your life. and you, you seriously don't deserve to be in this situation you carefree hottie. i hope, beneath all the smiles that you portrayed ever since, there is still a little spark of yourself that can help you gain your joyful spirits again. i hope you move on soon, naddie. know that you've got all those lovely people in your life. appreciate them. they love you. surprisingly, i do too babe. i wish you all the best and take care. MUAH! :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. i think you know him babe. 2008/2009 memang my myspace i was filled with his name and pictures. he was a huge part of my life.
    thank you musfirah. :) i will, i'm gonna be okay. <3

    ReplyDelete
  6. and funnily, i went searching for your myspace but then of course, it is set to be private. i forgot my myspace pword already. HE HE HE. i kinda have this instinct saying that i know him too, but whoever he is, i know you will get this through. you are getting it through already. just haven't reached the top point yet. HOWEVER, you are arriving already and I BELIEVE IN THAT :) and one most important thing is that, never stop having faith okay Naddie. that, you are getting this through. and that, you are arriving to the point. because soon, you will be there :) i strongly believe in that <3

    ReplyDelete